– Jennifer and Ted V., parents of Clarke and Michell
I learned from that meeting, though, that the Collaborative team was going to make sure that my voice was heard during our meetings – just as they were going to make sure I was aware of my husband’s interests. I was especially grateful to my husband’s attorney. He made me feel that what I was saying was important to him, even though his job was to represent my husband. I began to actually look forward to our meetings in a strange way, because I felt stronger and more in control of my life after each one. My attorney became my “gentle agent of reality,” as she liked to call herself.
A turning point came for me during one meeting when my husband was trying very hard to show me how I should invest the assets I was getting from our divorce so they could last me for the rest of my life. It hit me that what he was telling me made a lot of sense, and that maybe he was really trying to be kind to me, instead of trying to control me, as I had assumed. I looked at him and said, “Thank you. I appreciate the fact that you care about my future.” At that moment I think I let the seeds of forgiveness into my heart, and I believe it encouraged my husband to be more generous with me than either of us had ever considered.
At the end of the process, I still felt sad that my marriage was ending. I knew a lot more about myself, though, and I felt that the relationship between my husband and me was in tact, although it was certainly different than the way I had hoped it would be. Now, we can be at our son’s events together without being uncomfortable. We have talked, and I don’t think either of us has any regrets about how we handled our divorce. The Collaborative Law process truly allowed us to make the best of a bad situation.
– Catherine R.
– Glen P.
The financial neutral helped us come up with a settlement that both my husband and I agreed would work. Part of the plan was an agreement by each of us that, if we ever remarried, we would enter into a pre-marital agreement keeping the assets that came from our divorce separate and that those assets would be left to our children and their families at the time of our death – something that our attorneys were quick to tell us we would never get in court.
– Rachel B.
–M.S. and M.S. (former spouses)
–R.M. (Collaborative Divorce client)