Collaborative Divorce Texas

  • Donate
  • For Professionals
    • Membership Advantages
    • Events/Training
    • Become a Member
    • For Students
    • Volunteer at CDT
    • Advertise With Us
  • Contact Us
  • Login
  • Home
  • Find a Collaborative Professional
  • What is a Collaborative Divorce?
    • What is Collaborative Divorce?
    • Frequently Asked Questions
    • About CDTexas
    • Master and Credentialed Collaborative Divorce Professionals
    • The Gay G. Cox Award for Excellence in Collaborative Law
  • Blog
  • For Collaborative Professionals
    • Membership Benefits
    • Events/Training
    • Become a Member
    • For Students
    • Advertise With Us
    • Volunteer at CDT
    • Login
  • Donate
  • Contact Us
  • What is Collaborative Divorce?
    • What is Collaborative Divorce?
    • Why Use a CDTexas Member?
    • About Us
    • Master and Credentialed Collaborative Divorce Professionals
    • The Gay G. Cox Award for Excellence in Collaborative Law
  • Testimonials
  • FAQs
  • Blog
  • Find A Professional
    • How Do I Choose a Collaborative Professional?
    • Attorneys
    • Financial Professionals
    • Mental Health Professionals
    • See All

Donate

You are here: Home / Blog / Ten Common Problems in Marriage

Ten Common Problems in Marriage

December 18, 2018 By Harry Munsinger, J.D., Ph.D.

Married couples often develop bad habits that can produce resentment and divorce.

People marry young, share good and bad times, have a family, begin to fight, and have sex less often as they age.  Suddenly they feel alone when they are with their partner.  What happened?  Generally, if you recognize a problem in your relationship and are willing to take steps to change your bad habits, you can fix the marriage.  However, it takes two to make a marriage work so if one spouse has his or her foot out the door, it can be difficult to fix a marriage.

1. Communication Issues

The most common complaint among married couples is lack of communication.  Many couples put up with problems rather than try to fix them.  In the beginning they agreed he would earn money and she would take care of the house and kids. When they face new challenges later on, they have to negotiate a new compact.  The issue is whether spouses can listen to each other’s complaints without interrupting or getting defensive and reach anew consensus.

2. Ignoring Boundaries

It’s not uncommon for one spouse to try to change his or her partner.  Whether it’s how he or she dresses or about fundamental beliefs, trying to change your spouse will feel like a personal invasion and may trigger defensiveness oranger.  Overstepping boundaries can destroy mutual trust.  The result is likely to be retaliation or withdrawal from the relationship.

3. Lack of Sexual Intimacy

There are lots of reasons couples lose interest in sex–ranging from medical problems to emotional issues.  Generally, sexual problems trigger a vicious cycle where it’s difficult to want sex when you feel emotionally distant from your partner and it’s difficult to feel emotionally attached without experiencing sexual intimacy. To get past sexual indifference, couples need to discuss and resolve their emotional issues.

4. Emotional or Sexual Infidelity

A common problem in many marriages is for the couple to become emotionally distant.  When this happens, it’s likely he or she may start looking around.  Emotional infidelity can lead to adultery and cheating is destructive of a marriage.  It’s important for every couples to discuss and agree on what constitutes infidelity.

5. Fighting About Money

Disagreements about money are inevitable in a marriage.  One spouse may want to save while the other wants to spend.  Disagreement about money usually reflect different core values.  To avoid these problems, it’s important to discuss and agree how to handle finances.

6. Selfishness

If one spouse constantly places his or her needs above the goals and interests of the marriage, it’s only a matter of time before the neglected spouse begins to feel rejected and unloved.  Getting married involves give and take rather than getting your own needs met all the time.  If one spouse dictates the terms of the marriage and won’t compromise, that’s a recipe for disaster.

7. Value Differences

When a couple has core value differences, such as religious preferences, that can cause serious problems.  They may have major disagreements about what religion to teach their children.  Other differences include how to discipline, definitions of right and wrong, or other ethical conflicts.  Everyone doesn’t grow up with the same values, morals, or goals and there is lots of room for debate about right and wrong.  If a couple can’t learn to adjust to different values, they may have serious problems in their marriage.

8. Different Life Stages

Most couples don’t think about differences in life stages when they marry, but this can be a significant problem with couples are different ages.  Personalities change and a couple may not remain compatible as they transition to different life stages.  An older husband may not be interested in beginning a new family while the young bride is anxious to have a baby, or he may be nearing retirement and want to slow down while she needs to stay active.

9. Boredom

Doing the same old thing can get tiresome and it’s hard to make changes in a comfortable relationship until it’s too late.  Doing something new from time to time can add spark and spice to a relationship.

10. Jealousy

Being jealous can turn a marriage sour, especially if the jealous feelings are unrealistic.  Jealous persons can become overbearing and controlling or angry and rejecting.  If you are feeling jealous, see a counselor to decide wither your feelings are reasonable.  You may have an attachment problem that needs to be discussed with a competent counselor.

It does take two to make a marriage work.  If the marriage cannot be fixed because one or both spouses no longer want to be married, call an experienced San Antonio Divorce Attorney.

The Law Office of Harry Munsinger has been helping clients in Bexar County to successfully divorce without draining the family estate and ruining relationships with children and other family members.

Want to Read More?

5 Things to Tell (or Not Tell) Your Divorce Lawyer
https://harrymunsinger.com/what-are-my-divorce-options-in-texas/
Tips for Kids Going Back to School after a Divorce

About Harry Munsinger, J.D., Ph.D.

Harry Munsinger practices collaborative and estate law in San Antonio. He has over twenty years experience resolving disputes involving divorce, probate, wills, and trusts. Harry was an adjunct law professor at the University of Texas and St. Mary’s University. He has published several textbooks and over forty psychological and legal articles. Harry has been a forensic psychology expert, a licensed psychologist and a litigator.

Filed Under: Blog, Harry Munsinger

Find a Professional

Getting started with the Collaborative Process?

First your need to connect with a trained Collaborative Professional.

[Find Out More....]

Articles by Category

Featured Video

  • Child of Divorce
  • Collaborative Divorce Testimonial

Why Collaborative?

  • Jennifer Leister
  • Steve Walker
  • Carla Calabrese
  • Dawn Budner
  • Becky Davenport
  • Jody Johnson
  • Honey Schef
  • James Urmin
  • Kurt Chacon
  • Natalie Gregg
  • Robert Matlock
  • Deborah Lyons
  • Carlos Salinas
  • Camille Scroggins
  • Linda Solomon
  • Richard Soat
  • Lisa Rothfus
  • Jeffrey Shore
  • Barbara Cole
  • David Brunson
  • Jennifer Tull
  • Syd Sh
  • Susan Z. Wright
  • Christi Trusler
  • Camille Milnser
  • Linda Threats
  • Sarah Keathley
  • MaryAnn Kildebeck
  • David Bouschor
  • LIsa Marquis
  • Harry Munsinger
  • Vicki James
  • Robin Watts
  • Katie Berry
  • Jack Emmott
  • Jennifer Broussard
  • Patricia Havard
  • Paula Locke Smyth
  • Laura Schlenker
  • Norma Trusch
  • Brett Christiansen
  • Tim Whitten
  • Mickey Gayler
  • Melinsa Eitzen
  • Julian Schwartz
  • MaryAnn Knolle
  • Chad Olsen
  • Chris Farish
  • Charles Quaid
  • Anne Shuttee
  • Barbara Runge
  • Rhonda Cleaves -
  • Jamie Patterson
  • Catherine Baron
  • Kristen Algert
  • Sandra Roland
  • Rhonda Cleaves 2
  • Gratia Schoemakers

Have you read?

Financial Planning for Post Divorce

Divorce is an uncomfortable time for most couples. Even if you are going through the divorce using a collaborative approach, you probably don’t know what to expect from the split – which can be … [Read More...]

More Articles from this Category

The Collaborative Law Institute of Texas

d/b/a
Collaborative Divorce Texas

Proud Members of IACP

1400 Preston Road
Suite 400
Plano, TX 75093
(972) 386-0158

Please note: Our office will be closed on

Holiday closures:
Limited: Nov. 23rd & 24th
Closed: Nov. 25th , 26th and 27th

Christmas:
Closed from December 24-December 30, 2022.
Offices open on January 2nd, 2023.


Website Terms of Usage

Contact Our Webmaster

 

Follow Us

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • Vimeo
  • YouTube

Search Our Website

Find A Professional

  • Find a Collaborative Professional
  • Attorneys
  • Financial Professionals
  • Mental Health Professionals
  • See All
EnglishFrançaisDeutschItalianoPortuguêsEspañol

Copyright © 2023 · Collaborative Divorce Texas · All Rights Reserved

· · ·

Web Design and Maintenance by The Crouch Group