How a Collaborative Divorce Can Be a Gift of Love

Valentine’s Day is upon us — and for some couples, that’s not necessarily good news. This article from Divorce Magazine points out that February 15 is one of the busiest days on a divorce lawyer’s calendar. That should come as no surprise, given that Valentine’s Day and its image of happy, romantic couples puts extra pressure on those couples who are no longer happy and romantic.

As people begin to face the reality of getting divorced, they realize that it is not a simple process. The shared legal and financial responsibilities that come with marriage make parting ways more complicated than simply saying, “We’re through.” And if children are involved, that adds a whole other layer of complications to parting ways.

At the time a couple decides to divorce, they have to make fundamental choices about how they want to proceed.   Do they want to remain cordial?  Do they want a public fight?  Do they still have any family  values in common?

If children are involved,  the parents will almost certainly be required to communicate and interact. The more cordial they can be with one another, the easier it will be to meet the needs of the children.

But even if children aren’t involved, divorce involves couples who, at one time in their lives, were in love and pledged to look after one another. That’s why Collaborative Law is seen as not only a better alternative to a traditional courtroom divorce, but also an alternative more in the spirit of what marriage is supposed to be. Certainly, not all marriages can last, and divorce is oftentimes the painful conclusion to a journey begun when a couple realizes something isn’t right in their relationship.

But too many times, courtroom divorces result in increased animosity and discord, in contrast to what could have been a more peaceful, solution-driven process in a Collaborative Law setting. For children, courtroom divorces can be especially hard to go through. Collaborative Law divorces in Texas usually include  mental health professionals specifically brought in to help all involved through the process and to help create an appropriate parenting plan.

So, while it’s not candy or flowers, the opportunity to part ways amicably at the end of a relationship — as afforded by the Collaborative Law process — can be one of the most important and long-lasting gifts a couple can give one another.