To infinity, and beyond… Well not quite. But when you are going through a divorce, it can feel as if the process will never end, especially if you’ve chosen litigation. During a litigated divorce, it’s not uncommon for spouses to have so much trouble communicating about divorce, money, and children, they end up speaking only through their attorneys. Sound familiar? I’m sure your friends have told you the horror stories. It soon becomes easy for information, as well as intentions, to be … [Read more...]
The Top 3 HUGE Settlement Mistakes
When you are facing a life changing decision like divorce, what do you think you will find more valuable: Someone to make you feel better by saying that nothing has to change, or someone who will give it to you straight, no chaser? I feel strongly that not enough people in the world of divorce professionals will truly tell it like it is. They tell you want you to hear which can lead you to make some HUGE mistakes. Easily avoidable mistakes…Mistakes that need not happen! I … [Read more...]
How To Be In Control Of Your Divorce
Divorce can be a time in our lives when we not only have our usual day-to-day life, but we now have also added, willingly or not, a substantial number of responsibilities and requirements on top of this already heavy load. We worry about the impact on our finances, family, and relationships. We struggle with the added commitments and the once shared responsibilities that are now solidly on our lap. Feeling in genuine control can give us a sense of calm and peace, but how can we achieve this when … [Read more...]
Retirement and Survival After Gray Divorce
As we get firmly settled into this new Millennium, one trend has firmly settled in with us: Baby Boomers divorcing at double the rate from the late 20th Century. As our life expectancies continue to increase, our attitudes about divorce continue to evolve. And while it’s not still rapidly increasing, Boomer divorce is likely here to stay. So is the sad fact that divorce after age 50 can be financially devastating, especially if you’re close to a planned retirement. You set aside a … [Read more...]
5 Mistakes Parents Make During and After Divorce
Divorce is stressful and creates a variety of emotions. It takes time for everyone to adjust to their new normal and for children to acclimate living in two homes instead of one. I often tell parents, adults choose to divorce, children do not, it’s not their decision to make, yet the divorce still happens to them. Children live the schedule and must adjust to two homes, multitasking their belongings, schoolwork and learning a new way of life without seeing both parents every day. Children and … [Read more...]
5 Common Money Mistakes in Divorce
For most people, the divorce process is emotionally draining and mentally exhausting. Many people describe it as a time of being frozen, numb, or moving in slow motions. Despite that emotional and mental trauma, you will be expected to go through your finances with a fine-tooth comb to ensure that your settlement agreement is fair and equitable. With divorce brain, that’s easier said than done! Even if you feel like you are clear headed, here are a few of the most common money mistakes to … [Read more...]
Divorce and Money – Covering All The Bases
I have been providing business valuations, characterization analysis and financial services for divorcing couples for over thirty years in Central Texas. I often tell clients considering a divorce that I believe the Collaborative process is the better of the bad, when compared to going through the challenges of a litigated divorce. There are many benefits for couples working toward their new normal when using the Collaborative divorce process. The first part on the Collaborative divorce … [Read more...]
What Is the Role of Custody Evaluations in a Divorce?
The role of custody evaluations in a divorce is to determine what is in the best interest of the children. A child custody evaluator will gather information from interviews with the family and also by gathering documentation, from the parties as well as other “collaterals” such as neighbors, teachers, therapists, etc. The evaluation will then decide what is the children's best interest going forward. A custody evaluation doesn't happen in every divorce, but it can be court-ordered, or it can … [Read more...]
Visitation And Residency Restrictions – Time And Distance Is The “Driver”
When clients are considering their proposed visitation/possession schedule or residency restriction, whether they are preparing for negotiation, option building, or requested relief from a Court, there are certain overriding issues they should consider. Clients who are considering something other than standard possession and residency restrictions should begin by thinking about the population increases in Texas, current and ongoing road construction projects, school schedules and … [Read more...]
What Does “Collaborative” Mean?
The term ‘collaborative divorce’ can sound like an oxymoron- words that just don’t go together. Many people assume that divorce has to be contentious and adversarial, so the word ‘collaborative’ doesn’t seem to be realistic. How can a process that involves pain, grief, anger, fear, and so many other emotions ever be called ‘collaborative’? Collaborative divorce is a legal process that has evolved over several decades influenced by professionals (including judges, attorneys, mental health … [Read more...]