Divorce is stressful and creates a variety of emotions. It takes time for everyone to adjust to their new normal and for children to acclimate living in two homes instead of one. I often tell parents, adults choose to divorce, children do not, it’s not their decision to make, yet the divorce still happens to them. Children live the schedule and must adjust to two homes, multitasking their belongings, schoolwork and learning a new way of life without seeing both parents every day. Children and … [Read more...]
5 Common Money Mistakes in Divorce
For most people, the divorce process is emotionally draining and mentally exhausting. Many people describe it as a time of being frozen, numb, or moving in slow motions. Despite that emotional and mental trauma, you will be expected to go through your finances with a fine-tooth comb to ensure that your settlement agreement is fair and equitable. With divorce brain, that’s easier said than done! Even if you feel like you are clear headed, here are a few of the most common money mistakes to … [Read more...]
Divorce and Money – Covering All The Bases
I have been providing business valuations, characterization analysis and financial services for divorcing couples for over thirty years in Central Texas. I often tell clients considering a divorce that I believe the Collaborative process is the better of the bad, when compared to going through the challenges of a litigated divorce. There are many benefits for couples working toward their new normal when using the Collaborative divorce process. The first part on the Collaborative divorce … [Read more...]
What Is the Role of Custody Evaluations in a Divorce?
The role of custody evaluations in a divorce is to determine what is in the best interest of the children. A child custody evaluator will gather information from interviews with the family and also by gathering documentation, from the parties as well as other “collaterals” such as neighbors, teachers, therapists, etc. The evaluation will then decide what is the children's best interest going forward. A custody evaluation doesn't happen in every divorce, but it can be court-ordered, or it can … [Read more...]
Visitation And Residency Restrictions – Time And Distance Is The “Driver”
When clients are considering their proposed visitation/possession schedule or residency restriction, whether they are preparing for negotiation, option building, or requested relief from a Court, there are certain overriding issues they should consider. Clients who are considering something other than standard possession and residency restrictions should begin by thinking about the population increases in Texas, current and ongoing road construction projects, school schedules and … [Read more...]
What Does “Collaborative” Mean?
The term ‘collaborative divorce’ can sound like an oxymoron- words that just don’t go together. Many people assume that divorce has to be contentious and adversarial, so the word ‘collaborative’ doesn’t seem to be realistic. How can a process that involves pain, grief, anger, fear, and so many other emotions ever be called ‘collaborative’? Collaborative divorce is a legal process that has evolved over several decades influenced by professionals (including judges, attorneys, mental health … [Read more...]
Collaborative Divorce: Preserving Relationships Post-Divorce
I recently lost a family member to cancer. Some people might not think of us as family, because he was my ex-husband. But because we divorced collaboratively, we were able to remain family from the very beginning of the divorce process up until I held his hand on his deathbed. As hard as it has been watching my children lose their dad, it has also been reassuring knowing that our sons felt loved, nurtured, and cared for, by both of us. That is because we made the decision to be the best co … [Read more...]
Divorce and Rising Interest Rates
Divorce already takes an emotional, mental, and financial toll on the family. The current real estate market has added to that with increasing interest rates, declining house prices and diminishing values in certain asset accounts Nationwide, there’s a shortage of available houses – especially at lower price points – compared to the number of would-be homebuyers. For a while, there was tons of talk of offers being made above asking, inspections being waived, no contingencies, bidding wars, … [Read more...]
Common Sense: Smart Clients Understand
Many clients think they are savvy negotiators, but they often fail to understand how their behaviors and attitudes towards each other throughout any divorce process effects the end result. What you and I see as common-sense negotiation tactics, are anything but that to our highly agitated divorce clients. We have all seen the Wife make digs at the unfaithful husband continuously throughout the divorce case. While such disparagement likely makes the wife feel a bit satisfied for a few … [Read more...]
The Importance of Better Communication Even During Divorce
There is no doubt that going through a divorce is extremely stressful. It is much akin to death. It is, in fact, the death of a marriage and nothing hurts like losing someone you love whether it is due to death, divorce or the breakup of a non-marital relationship. People go through the same stages of grief during a breakup that they would if their spouse died. Most of us have heard of Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’ five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. All of us … [Read more...]