Holidays can be daunting for children in the middle of a divorce. No matter how you celebrated past holidays, you need to establish new traditions now that you are divorcing. New holiday activities will help your children forget the pain of divorce and bring them joy. If possible, plan a joint Thanksgiving or Christmas celebration with your spouse because that will help your children feel comfortable. If that’s not practical, begin new traditions with your children. Keep the Kids … [Read more...]
Holiday Time-Sharing When You Are a “Different (Divorced) Kind of Family”
Holidays are a time for families. There is perhaps no more difficult time to be divorced than during the holiday season when everywhere that you look you see a reminder of what you have lost. In light of how hard it is for divorced adults to get through the holidays, it is just as hard for your children when their “new normal” or their “different kind of family” means they are sharing their holiday celebrations between homes and between parents. Divorced parents create a year round … [Read more...]
Happy Holidaze
The holiday season can be a time of merriment when celebrating with family and friends. Parents raising children in two homes, alternating time with the other parent may experience feelings of anxiousness or sadness during this time. Instead of grieving past family traditions, parents are encouraged to follow the following guidelines so that they might provide their children the best holiday experience ever. 1. Communicate directly and early with your co-parent Send business-like emails to the … [Read more...]
Give Peace a Chance
The day we honor Dr. Martin Luther King is right around the corner. I am reminded of one of his many quotes about peace; one of my favorites is: “Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek but a means by which we arrive at that goal.” I worked for many years in a bully prevention program teaching children and parents about making peaceful decisions. The root of many programs dealing with respect is based in parental modeling and positive mutual regard. These curricula are based in the … [Read more...]
What To Do If Valentine’s Day Convinced You To Get Divorced
Type in the words "Valentine's Day" and "divorce" next to each other, and you'll get a sense of how much pressure the holiday places on people to not only be in relationships, but to feel happy and fulfilled in them. One article, on celebrating Valentine's Day after divorce, advises people not to plan a first or second date on Valentine's Day because "it's too much pressure," or to avoid places where affectionate couples might congregate. And yet, there's something about the holiday that also … [Read more...]
Collaborative Divorce Expert Provides Back-to-School Advice
Carol Mapp, a Collaborative Law Institute of Texas member and a regular contributor to this blog, wrote a great and timely article for DFW Child on how divorced parents can help children of prepare for going back to school -- particularly if the divorce is brand-new and children are going between two households for the first time. Of course, the advice is sound for all parents, but for those parents who have used the collaborative process to help minimize the effects of divorce on their … [Read more...]
When Valentine’s Day Doesn’t Go As Planned
Most of us think of Valentine's Day as a holiday in which couples reaffirm their love for each other and their commitment to one another. However, as this article in today's New York Daily News points out, holidays like Valentine's Day can actually motivate some who are contemplating divorce to move into action. It can be a lot to think about, though -- there are legal considerations and financial considerations, not to mention the emotional impact that divorce can have on the spouses and their … [Read more...]
Revisiting Back-to-School Advice for Divorced Parents: Great Tips for the New School Year
Last year, one of our regular mental health professional contributors, Carol Mapp, wrote a column talking about tips for helping kids with two homes and their parents manage the transition from summer to the new school year. For those families that have just experienced divorce, there may also be a new school in the mix, and it can be a whole lot of change to kids to absorb. Here, once again, as many Texas children return to school this week, is Carol's column. It's full of wonderful advice for … [Read more...]
