By the time a Collaborative case seems ready to start because both sides have agreed to use the process and both have hired trained Collaborative lawyers, the parties start to get anxious to get the case moving. This is a natural reaction to the discussions that preceded the commitment to use Collaborative Law. Those discussions almost certainly emphasized the positive aspects of the process and how they fit the special needs of the parties. With expectations set high, the parties are … [Read more...]
How a Collaborative Divorce Can Be a Gift of Love
Valentine's Day is upon us -- and for some couples, that's not necessarily good news. This article from Divorce Magazine points out that February 15 is one of the busiest days on a divorce lawyer's calendar. That should come as no surprise, given that Valentine's Day and its image of happy, romantic couples puts extra pressure on those couples who are no longer happy and romantic. As people begin to face the reality of getting divorced, they realize that it is not a simple process. The shared … [Read more...]
You Don’t Have to Be Crazy to Need a Mental Health Professional in a Collaborative Divorce
If you or your spouse is crazy, you probably need all the help you can get. But most people going through a Collaborative divorce aren't crazy -- choosing Collaborative is a very rational, sane decision, after all! Actually, almost everyone going through a divorce could use some professional assistance, but some need it more than others. In a Collaborative divorce, the parties experience the same emotions that are experienced in a litigated divorce, although hopefully less intensively. In … [Read more...]
Can a Lawyer Wear Two Hats?
In litigation, there is always a tension between trial and settlement. One of the biggest strategy challenges a lawyer faces in the litigation process is trying to be a diplomat and a battle leader at the same time. Essentially, it's trying to balance a diplomat's hat and a war general's hat on the attorney's head at the same time. In the litigation process, even if the parties are intent on settlement, the lawyer still has to in some fashion keep his or her "war general" hat on. One of the … [Read more...]
Dealing with Family Businesses in Divorce
We wanted to make sure this didn't escape your attention: Collaborative Law Institute of Texas board trustee Tracy Stewart, a financial professional and CPA based in College Station, wrote a great article for the AICPA Wealth Management Insider last month entitled "Family Business: Avoiding Divorce Disaster." The article details some key dos and don'ts when a family business must be factored into the financial equation for a divorce settlement. This can be a tricky aspect of divorce … [Read more...]
Collaborative Divorce: It’s Not Mediation or Arbitration
For many people, when they first hear about Collaborative Law, they think it must be similar to arbitration or mediation, two other processes some people have heard of. Although they are all three considered disputes resolution processes, they are very different. An arbitrator hears both sides and makes a decision, instead of letting the parties come to an agreement. It is very similar to litigation. A mediator is a neutral person working with both sides to try to reach an agreement. In … [Read more...]
Creative Problem-Solving: The Essence of Collaborative Divorce
When people are getting started in a Collaborative Law case, they sometimes have a little trouble translating their initial enthusiasm for the process into the nitty-gritty of problem-solving. They either bring in preconceived ideas about how they want or think the process will work, or they become overwhelmed by looking at the mountain of issues they must face and resolve. They often wonder how they can possibly get everything worked out. To help those starting on the Collaborative … [Read more...]
What Advice We’d Give Tiger Woods (If We Were Asked)
First of all, as fans of Tiger Woods, we find his current predicament regrettable. While we recognize that our society is curious about the lives of public figures -- especially those as well-known as Tiger -- we understand how much harder his current situation is, given that he's being tried in the court of public opinion. We don't expect that Tiger will call us up and ask for our advice. We hope that he's able to work things out with his wife and not have to go through the painful … [Read more...]
How to Take Conflict Out of Divorce
It's possible to divorce in a way that supports the well-being of everyone. You can end the conflict, heal the hurt and part as friends. You just need to learn how. Unfortunately, most divorces are handled in a very different way. Sides are drawn and issues become something to fight over rather than something to resolve. Walls of protection get fortified and distance grows. Then we bring in adversarial attorneys and escalate the conflict dramatically. We hurt each other over and over, feeling … [Read more...]
What Your Lawyer Won’t Do For You In Collaborative Divorce
When you enter into a Collaborative Law negotiation, you have a lawyer advocating on your behalf, and there's another lawyer advocating on the other party's behalf. Meetings involve you, the other party, and the respective lawyers, and the goal is to settle any outstanding issues outside of a courtroom setting. In the Collaborative Law process, the lawyers involved cannot go to court and litigate against each other or the parties. This accomplishes several things crucial to developing a … [Read more...]
