In March of this year at the State Bar of Texas Annual Collaborative Law Conference I delivered the closing speech. This was the third time in a row I was asked to be the last speaker at the Conference. In 2020 I talked about The Power of Hope. In 2021 I spoke on Love in Time of COVID. In 2022 I spoke on The Love of the Game. I replayed videos of my interviews with divorced couples, divorce attorneys, and professionals in mental health and finance as to what they … [Read more...]
What Do Children Want and Need When Their Parents’ Divorce?
Children need to see their parents being supportive of each other, especially during a divorce. They need to see their parents having a united front - that they are still able to communicate with each other and make decisions for them that are in their best interest. Ultimately, children need to see that they are still both their parents even though they are getting a divorce. The Children's Bill of Rights was created many years ago. It is a Bill of Rights that helps parents remember that … [Read more...]
For Divorce with Special Needs Children – Collaborative Divorce is the Better Option
April is “Autism Acceptance Month.” Prior to 2021, this acknowledgement was called “Autism Awareness Month,” but as we have begun to learn more about autism and what it means to be “on the spectrum” of autism, we have learned that being on that spectrum is like a rainbow–there are many variations of abilities and inabilities, challenges and yet special gifts that people on the spectrum bring to our world and the families in which they live. One Texas Rehabilitation … [Read more...]
Divorce Is Different For Parents of Kids with Disabilities
Figuring out how to divide and share rights, responsibilities and time with the kids is hard for divorcing parents of all children – with and without disabilities -- because there are so many things to consider. Parents eventually land on how they will handle schedules, residences, health care, and support, but going through the process can generate a lot of reflection on childhood – and parenthood – over issues that didn’t seem to exist, back when the couple thought they would … [Read more...]
Protecting Our Children in Divorce.
Billy’s parents are divorcing. Billy is 7 years old and he is worried that he will never see his father again. Harper’s parents are divorcing. She is 19 years old and Harper is worried that her parents will no longer be able to pay for her college. Jim’s parents are divorcing. Jim is 10 years old. Jim is worried that he will be separated from his dog half the time. Madelyn’s parents are divorcing. She is 13 years old. Madelyn is worried that they will have to move, and she will lose all of her … [Read more...]
Think Like a Child When Going Through Divorce
For many of my years as a family lawyer I was asked by judges to represent the interests of children going through divorce. As an “ad litem” or “amicus attorney”, it was my duty to talk to my young charges to find out what they were thinking and what was bothering them. In many cases their parents couldn’t agree on where the children should live after the divorce, which parent should have the power to make decisions regarding the … [Read more...]
Ten Behaviors of Parents Who Keep Their Divorce Child Focused
When dealing with a divorce where children are a concern, it is of utmost importance to keep the proceedings focused on them and their well-being. A collaborative divorce can achieve this goal, in addition to skipping expensive litigation. Here, we have laid out ten behaviors that divorcing parents should display to keep the divorce child focused, so that parents can promote strong, happy, healthy children during this time. They do not confuse what is best for the children with what is best … [Read more...]
Finance and Children
Divorce is always a challenging time for parents and children alike. There are so many factors to consider such as custody schedules, selling or keeping the family home, splitting assets, etc. As the divorcing parents negotiate the terms of the divorce, they hopefully have the best interest of the children involved. One of the most contentious areas in divorce is finances. Many of the financial matters do not pertain to the children, but there are several that are directly related and managing … [Read more...]
Six Reasons To Choose A Child-Centered Collaborative Divorce
The best way to protect your children during a divorce is to stop fighting and don’t put them in the middle of your disputes. Don’t use the children to hurt each other–make your divorce about protecting them. A high-conflict divorce is harmful to children’s social, personal, and intellectual development–so avoid fighting. A child-centered collaborative divorce can minimize damage to children. Rather that litigate your divorce and postpone healing until after the trial, … [Read more...]
Divorce Is A Family Affair
Divorcing with children involves the whole family. One day, everyone knows where everyone is and where things go and what the rules are, the next day everything has changed. Parents do everything they can to ‘keep the kids out of it’, to let them know it isn’t their ‘fault’ and that these decisions are parent decisions. Collaborative Divorce supports parents and helps them see the child’s concerns and address them in unique ways. Fear Of The Dark Children fear the dark and monsters. As a … [Read more...]